What I can remember of a rather cryptic posting from B Sqn Notice board Nee Soon.
It has come to the attention of the Officer Commanding that other ranks are using water in an indiscriminate way for washing, shaving and other facets of personal hygiene.
THIS IS TO STOP IMMEDIATELY.
Water is not only a precious commodity which must be closely controlled in order to accommodate the needs of the Officers Mess and Stables.
Other ranks are reminded that this abuse of water can ultimately result in the following :-
Reduction of natural oils of the skin rendering that soldier more prone to disease and that this condition could be construed as a self inflicted injury.
A “blanching” or lightning of the skin tone rendering that soldier almost impossible to conceal or camouflage, putting both himself and his pals at risk.
The possibility of creating unwanted divisions in the Squadron between the washed and the unwashed, the light and the dark.
Water for drinking will still be available but will now be issued daily behind the SQMS store to one nominated member of each Troop.
Phil Hayward
I wasn't in Malaya ,but that order is worthy of something out of " It Aint Half Hot Mum"
ReplyDeletePaddy
"Must be closely controlled in order to accomodate the needs of the officers mess" seems to be discimination and wouldnt be tollerated in these present times, but it brings me to the story that I belive is true and is related to Phils posting in the way of water and the Officers Mess.
ReplyDeleteBetween 1965 and 1969 it is rumoured that someone working in the Officers Mess in Detmold was caught pissing in the Offices Mess urn. How long he had been doing this is unknown. Hope Fred Collingwood didnt drink it but there is something about his complection that makes me think................No he didnt,did you Fred? I do know of someone trying to get a medical discharge by getting up in the morning and peeing on his mattress. Silly bugger eneded up paying for his mattress. No names sorry. Who put his " dear John" letter up on "B" sqdn notice board in 66 Phil?
And we had a silly man in Wolfenbüttel got his medical discharge - he was on main gate guard,pulled out his pistol,pointed it at his foot - bang!!!!What the silly man did'nt think about was the fact that he was standing on concrete blocks,and instead of a bullet hole the round splatttered and took half his foot away.
ReplyDeleteAnd its worth noting the old saying - "too much water weakens you"
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Don
Mad (Ian) Gadd ??? for the dear John; Perhaps Cpl (Vic) Paine for the odd orders?
ReplyDeletePhil
Sign No2.
ReplyDeleteQM Stores Tidworth ???
All ranks are reminded that , in the event of their unfortunate demise, they are to lie down. It is both unnatural and unseemly for the deceased to continue to walk around at will.
It further renders it almost impossible to distinguish between the ‘walking dead’ and the speed of movement of persons working in the Quatermasters stores.
Phil
Sign No3 (thats all for now!)
ReplyDeleteParachute Store. Middle Wallop
It has now been officially confirmed that VD can be caught through the ears.
THIS IS DUE TO CONTUALLY LISTENING TO A**HOLES.
Now, how can we help you ?
Beds are to be made up
ReplyDeleteAs laid down
In standing orders!
And the certain SQMS who had put on Sqn Orders - all items noted as deficient on the kit check are to be handed into the SQMSs stores by 1630hrs Friday.
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Don
I went to the SQMS' in Detmold to draw out a tank suit for an exercise only to be told by the storeman " You can't have one as there is only one left and somebody might want it". Is it me or is it something they put in storemens tea. Stores is for storing if I was meant to issue the stuff this place would be called issues. Now turn smartly to the right and f**** off.
ReplyDeleteDave 118
Ah Dave - that storeman obviously did not consider you a "somebody".But then maybe he thought he would be the next Spud Lewis?
ReplyDelete-------
Don